Monday, May 29, 2006



Hung out with the boy tonight. It was terrible. Like, just awful. I don't think we're even friends anymore, but somehow, neither of us can admit it. The first half of the night was quietly uncomfortable, leading to a middle section of me silently seething, with the last part just being us yelling at each other about a million different things - mostly me calling him heartless and him calling me crazy.

How are so many of the people I thought were my closest friends not my friends anymore?

My relationship with the boy was always volatile - we've had a thousand late night fights. But, like I said to him, it's like there's nothing even worth fighting over at this point, because there's no good part. Our friendship just doesn't work. I don't even know what to do with that. He's meant more to me than just about anyone for the last several years of my life, and it's like the last shreds of that connection are giving way.

I feel like total sludge.

Oh, and he finally told me he has a girlfriend, which was bound to happen sooner or later. Of course, he yelled it at me in the middle of the fight, which seems fitting.

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