Sunday, April 02, 2006



I got a call from my mom this afternoon, telling me that the doctors are giving my grandmother about 24 hours to live. She's been in a coma since Monday.
And I wish I could be with my family, but I live on the other side of the country. And I'm a mess and I'm upset and what I want most of all is for ex boyfriend to take care of me. I'm not even sure why that is so what I want. Maybe because he is from that part of my life. Maybe because I'm used to being able to count on him like that.
I was talking to a friend, and told them that I really felt like I needed to call ex boyfriend. They asked if I really thought it would help, then asked if I thought he would even answer. I hadn't even thought of it. We're still in teh can't call each other part of the breakup. But this isn't even about that, and I really need him.
My friend suggested I text him so he'd know what it was about, and that it is really important that he call me back. Sound advice. So I did. And he still didn't call me back. How hurtful is that? I feel like I'm going to puke.

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