Tuesday, January 10, 2006
So, my roommate gave me a notebook she labelled a "stalk log" for Christmas. I've actually started to write in the damned thing. I know, how psychotic and pathetic. And how ridiculous, considering that I am trying so hard to wean myself off of the boy. I mean, I didn't keep a stalk log in my scariest stalker-iest moments, and I'm going to do it now? I guess it just sort of gives me a way to sort of focus on him, which I can't help doing, without causing any damage to myself or my attempts to emancipate myself from this pathetic lovesick prison that I've kept myself in for the last several years. I don't know. It is probably mostly stupid, like most of my actions pertaining to him, but if it gets me through the day to write down how many times he is checking his Myspace or some shit, then I guess I'll go with it - for now.