Wednesday, October 19, 2005

 

misdirect

My roommate says she can no longer support me in my quest for the boy. She says he is never going to want me, there's no chance, and that by continuing down this road, that I'm just going to have only heartbreak and sadness. And she can't watch it, and she can't support me, and she needs me to just give up.

And I know her whole stand is designed as an attempt to change my feelings about the boy, but all it does is change my feelings about her.

Because I would and have stand by her through infatuations at least as hopeless and painful as mine. I think that is what friends do. Even if you don't agree, you have each other's backs. I certainly think it is what she expects from me. But maybe I'm the one who's wrong. I am wrong a lot of the time about a lot of things. This could be one of them.

I don't know what to do about her. But I know my feelings aren't up for public debate or discussion. Even though I post them on the internet. Right. I know. It doesn't make sense to me either.

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